Monday, October 3, 2011

Wrong Number

I'm sitting in my office yesterday working on our summer schedule. As I'm working I hear an unfamiliar beeping from my cell phone. I look over and see that I'm receiving an "unavailable" call. Apparently "unavailable" calls or so special they kick out my normal "Meant To Live" ring-tone. But I digress...

The following is my transcribed interpretation of the phone call that ensued:

Me: Hello?

Creepy Man: Yes, could I speak with Jim Carter?

(note: I was surprised to discover former president Jimmy Carter was still alive...and has a Verizon plan.)

Me: I'm sorry, you have the wrong number.

Surprised Creepy Man: *long pause*......*exhales breath very slowly*...Are you sure?

Me: (Little taken aback by the question) Um...yes. You have the wrong number.

Creepier Breathing Man: *short pause*....This is the number I called.

Me: Um...yes, that's why I answered.

Frustrated Creepy Man: This is his number.

Me: Well, he must have changed it, because this is my number.

Logical Thinking Creepy Man: Ok, well I called 555-1234.

Me: That's my number.

Matter-of-Fact Creepy Man: No, that's Jim's number.

(note: I am now starting to doubt why I answered instead of Jim.)

Me: I don't know Jim, but I do know this is my number now.

Creepy Sighing Man: *siiiiigh* *pause*

(note: I'm afraid to hang up. For some reason I believe that he will find me.)

Skeptical Creepy Man: ....Alright (sarcastically) I guess I was wrong.

(note: At this point I wonder if I was adopted and my biological father had finally tracked me down. I waited for a "How's your mother?" or a "Good Gracious! It's like I'm listening to my own voice." Also I feel the need to apologize to this man...and I don't know why. All I did was answer my phone.

Me: Alright.

Somewhat Defeated Creepy Man: *slow exhale* Fine.

Me: Ok.

Have-The-Last-Laugh Creepy Man: I guess I'll call back later.

Click.

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